Quarter Life Crisis Part 1

I am obsessed with winning. Unfortunately, my political record doesn't reflect this. Like my fantasy leagues this year, I am mediocre at best. 1-2.

2008 (primary) L
2010 (primary) W
2012 (general) L
2014 (general) ?

The good news (if you want to look at it that way)... is that I'm not on the record this year. This midterm I'm like a cheerleader - Ra ra sis boom ba gooooooooooo individual liberties and the free market! This year I focus on turning out strong support among my peers on issue based voting.

This year I can't lose. I also can't win and it's driving me crazy.

The funny thing about growing older and wiser is that I prefer to place the emphasis on being wiser.

A college junior in New Hampshire recently told me he thought I looked 30. I'm 25 for the record, and had that punk not been volunteering at my call bank I would have publicly shamed him on Yik Yak. Because I'm an adult, I just told him I thought he looked 17.

I still get the fabulous luxury of field work this cycle, as you can tell from above mentioned supporter.

Carpetbagger, establishment hag, and ginger bitch - come to mind as favorite nicknames adorned from the campaign trail. And that was friendly fire. Can you imagine why no normal women want to run for office?

Campaigns are the worst thing and the best thing. People that chose to work on campaigns are self-inflicting, self-important, self-deprecating, selfish-- lucky bastards and I'm so jealous so they can all just shut up already.

It's war. And your coworkers go to battle with you every day. I'd say it's a noble job, but it's not. It's keeping volunteers on script and keeping the crazy county party from annexing themselves from the state party because they feel they haven't received the appropriate amount of campaign bumper stickers.

"Bush '04 gave us bumper stickers AND yard signs!"

Entitled comes to mind... This is why we can't have nice things.

I suddenly remember why it's so nice having a steady desk job. Quarter life crisis, you'll just have to wait while I'm paving the way to electoral victory in 2016. Sometimes breaks are good.

I'll take the next few weeks on the road to suck in all that campaign field work has to offer - without any of the worrying over hypotheticals where I end up with another "L" on my record and jobless. And, of course, have a few laughs at the newbies expense.

Oh my god, we have to shift resources? The sky is falling.