Hey 2013, Don't Let the Door Hit You on the Way Out!

Christmas time and New Years really does bring out the best and worst in me.  I am very optimistic for the future, excited to spend time with my family and friends, proud of the achievements I made over the past year, and hypercritical of all of my mistakes. 

I have barely blogged this year.  My #1 regret.  I can only describe this year as full of highs and lows (and I have a blog archive full of unpublished posts to prove it.)  I didn't share anything because was scared of coming off too proud/angry.  I held a lot in and lost perspective on what was going on around me.  I was a pressure cooker.  For example, I wrote:

I think it's really easy to drop the line "Man this city really makes you cynical" or "Damn, this work really does drive you to drinking."  It's easy because it's the obvious thing to say -- it's right there in front of you every day.  How grown up am I?  I have other grown up cynical friends that are also boring, have drinking problems and prescriptions to performance enhancing drugs.  What am I doing with my life?  Working at a dead-end job and feeling handcuffed to it until then next election cycle for fear of looking too "Millennial" on my resume. 

If there is one thing I hate more than generalizations it is stereotypes. And, unfortunately, I couldn't escape either this year.  I decided that I needed an intervention after self diagnosing myself as a stick-in-the-mud.  Somewhere in the last year I forgot to breathe and just look around -- not critically, but as an observer (I'm really good at the former, I've discovered).

I have spent the good part of the last year complaining and finding faults in everyone around me.  It certainly didn't help that it all started with a crushing defeat in the '12 cycle.  I think I went into 2013 thinking, "Everything is going to shit, but hey at least I'm one of the lucky ones that got a job."  Screaming endorsement for a successful year.  As we all know, the rush to bag a job post-Election Day usually never pans out for the long term.  But, by holding it in I never got the chance to hear how everyone else felt about their job.  Clarification: I never took the time to listen.  Turns out, I wasn't the only one - not by a long shot.

The day after my 24th birthday everything changed and I realized that I was living with a bag over my head.  That was when I started changing things up.  I ruffled a lot of feathers because I fell out of line.  I had my very first DC power scuffle!  I was so upset that I had to cut ties with someone I had once held in high regard.  What would people think of me?  What would people say about me?  Turns out no one was talking at all - funny how that happens.

Now I find myself 11 days out from the start of 2014 and I couldn't be more excited for the year ahead.  Through the ups and downs, I'm walking away from 2013 with several new battle scars and a lot to be thankful for.  I have a new job on a great tech team full of talented individuals and our plans for next year make me do a little happy dance.  So many friends got married this year and welcomed new babies into the world and even more are prepping for the same this coming year!  You are the ones that helped me put everything into perspective the most, so let me close by saying thank you.

My top four life lesson learned from 2013: 

1.  Surrounding yourself with the wrong sorts of people is more harmful than knowing good people is helpful. The negativity, drama, and tumult they bring to your life wastes time and distracts you from focusing on yourself and the things and people that actually matter. 

2.  Not all friends are created equal, and not all of them stand the test of time.  And that is ok.  As I get older, my perspective on life changes, the things I value and appreciate morph.  And, I'm not the only one!  This happens to everyone.  And sometimes where I change, so does a friend, but in a different direction.  You don't need to chase everyone down their own path. 

3.  Don't compare your life with the lives of your friends as depicted on social media.  Some of the saddest people I know in real life look to have the most exciting lives on Facebook and Instagram.  Filters and selective sharing will do that - it's called building a personal brand, people.  Enjoy your life for everything it is that can't be captured in 140 characters.  (But, still be happy for all of your friends' successes)

4.  Don't be fearful of threats.  Those who threaten you are the ones who stand to lose the most.  Stick to your principles and trust your gut.

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!  Thank you for being a wonderful part of my life!

-Sarah

Introductory Guide to The District (For Interns)

I have been a resident of the Greater Washington area for 3 years now, which began with three months as an intern. Over my time as a resident and a tourist I've learned a lot about the daily grind and taboos of the city. This post is my way of passing on the knowledge of my interactions and observations learned over the past few years that are particularly relevant to incoming interns.

For continuity's sake I will start with the basics and move onto the greater complexities of how this city judges it's inhabitants:

Metro Etiquette: Stand to the right on the escalator, walk on the left. A simple enough concept that visitors quickly catch on to (especially during rush hours). This is the most important city in the free world, people have places to go and people to see! The rush may seem absurd to the leisurely visitor, but trust me: if you make someone miss their train don't expect the welcome wagon. Side note: Take notice of a person's body language before asking a question or starting up conversation. Most people prefer to be left alone to their thoughts. You don't want to embarrass yourself by getting shot down in a metro car (then sit there in the awkward aftermath until your next stop, which is probably Metro Center or Federal Triangle).

The Wardrobe: Dress to impress. First impressions are not easily forgotten! People will try to size you up by the watch, shoes, dress, or hairstyle you are rocking. No wrinkles, pleats, or sparkles need apply. This is not NYC, you won't find the masses in Louis Vutton heels and Vera Wang dresses - but that doesn't mean you shouldn't be dressed in sweatpants. A friend of mine best put this into perspective when he said, "People trust their peers, not outsiders." If you dress like a metal head, don't expect to be invited into The Madison. Dress like an entry level employee, don't expect to roll with the executives. DC is a Lilly Pulitzer, Tori Burch, Burberry kind of town - it has a very southern feel to it, so wear that and you'll fit in just fine! Personally, I recommend a little flavor. Add your personality to your wardrobe for a little POW!

Now, if you aren't into "materialistic things" and the "status quo" you are one of two types of people:
a) A hipster - in which case you dress like you work for a Che Guevara PAC or a fair trade advocacy group and spend just as much money on looking underground as you would on clothes from J Crew or Anthro. OR you give zero fucks, and your career matches your ensemble.
b) A libertarian - in which case you learn to embrace the capitalism behind the materialism OR move back home because DC just didn't understand about how right you were about the gold standard. You showed them!

My best advice: Try to avoid the 1990s Hilary-esque pant suit look and kitten heels (h/t WSWCM)
All in all, take care of yourself. If you don't respect yourself, no one else will either.

Name dropping: This is an art form that I see butchered on a daily basis, and it just so happens to be my biggest pet peeve. Name droppers suck - that's universal. If you want to drop a name be smart about it... don't come out and say it, make the people work for it. If they don't give a shit enough to ask you for more information, guess what: they don't care. Wait for another time. Rarely is anyone impressed that you were in a hearing and a Senator asked you for a tissue or you sat beside the hot new political writer in CPAC's blogger box. Name dropping is all about the art of subtlety, so for goodness sakes be subtle if you insist on name dropping in the first place!

The Happy hour buzz: It's called a happy hour, not a power hour. While the idea of free alcohol may send you running back to the bar due to the adrenaline rush, resist the urge to load up like there's a run on booze. HH's are a great resource to find and make friends in the city, but if you treat them like your personal liquor distributor it won't be long before you make a fool of yourself. I do my best to abide by the 2 drink maximum rule. You never want to be sloppy. Even if you have to nurse the same drink for an hour - you are much better off doing that than matching your companions drink-for-drink. After all, the name of the game is to come out on top: You want to walk away having more information than when you got there. Be tight lipped and just listen to what everyone else happens to spill. Before you open your mouth always ask yourself, "What do I gain from telling him/her this?" if there is nothing to gain, don't say it.

Gossip: Beware of your company. It's a small town, chances are if you're talking about someone it will get back to them. Be very careful of talking about someone in the midst of a stranger/acquaintance because chances are they know of or are friends with that person. I've been bitten in the ass with this one before - loyalty is hard to come by and takes a lot of time to cultivate. Just because they haven't met said person doesn't mean they won't in the future. Everyone talks, and I mean everyone. I'm guilty of doing this myself. If someone is stupid enough to run their mouth in front of mixed company to show off you better believe, if given the chance, those people will use it their advantage. Practice safe situational awareness.

Celebrities: Be cool, don't swoon. For political nerds, like me, running into Hilary Clinton or John Boehner probably feels like the equivalent of what a normal person my experience when encountering George Clooney or Brad Pitt. The difference between Hollywood and The District, however, is that you are an actor on the same stage. Act like an extra and that's where you will stay. Be confident and always have a backup plan as far as conversation goes as to avoid awkward small talk and lengthy pauses in conversation. Most importantly, just be a reasuring presence. People pick up on the vibes you give off.

Work Ethic: Most importantly, work hard every day. No one task is beneath you. Everyone has to sharpen their teeth by first answering phone calls, alphabetizing files and delivering coffee - Including your boss. If you can't manage to smile through the easy stuff, why would anyone trust you with an actual job.

MORE importantly, enjoy the city! Get out and have fun. Take advantage of all the free lunches, seminars, dinners, galas, happy hours... etc. Make it a priority to meet new people every day and just generally be open to new experiences. You never know who you'll run into and how he/she will change your life. All of the best opportunities I've had in this city came from a last minute decision to attend an event or party. DC is a social city - see or be seen! If you came here to make waves then you better not think you can do that from the comfort of your desk at work and home alone.


Photo h/t freefashioninternships.com